don't dig yet

What exactly is being an ally of your own gravediggers?
I tried to brush away that concept when I read about it in Kundera's Immortality, but it was too late.
I was tossing and turning in bed at 2AM just thinking about it.
It was Kundera's way of labeling those who adapt to the changes in the world and are being nothing but absolutely modern.

Absolutely modern is another concept altogether, but let me tell you something about it:
To be absolutely modern is to leave behind a set of beliefs or passion for something for the very reason that a group of authorties (now mainly the media) have changed the world's view of it, and it has now become passe and irrelevant.
This is the reason we don't hear Beethoven on most radio stations and we don't walk around sporting the tsunami hairstyle of the 80s.
To be absolutely modern is to leave behind something so precious to one's self, and go with the flow, with whatever everyone else likes or deems will give them a better chance at passing the "you're not socially retarded" test.
And in that sense, Kundera observes, one becomes an ally of his own gravediggers.
One throws away something so dear to him to force himself to like (and eventually he does!) something that the authorities of modernity have introduced, something that has stripped you of your passion and faith in something. And since what is "modern" changes several times in his lifetime, he will be forced to go with the flow for the rest of his life, and he will forget what passion is all about. And one thing about passion, it keeps you going and gives meaning to one's life. Without it a person may die inside, feel empty, go down with the system, a system that killed passion in the first place.

Relating this to myself, I have indeed become absolutely modern in many ways.
The "most modern" move I made was going away to leave a closely-knit family and lots of dear friends to experience life abroad and help myself to a serving of globalization.

But I refuse to become an ally of my own gravediggers, because in lots of ways, I am still holding on to what I left behind, because I will come back, and will just pick up where I left off.
But what is certain in this world but change, which you must embrace it before it crushes you?
Surely my my loved ones back home will change, and no doubt I will too, but is it possible to still connect with them in a way that I had so easily done before?

Of course.
After all, life is a cycle, and where else will you land a million miles and some years later, but home, where just being with your family and friends create a spark among you that you are so familiar with.
And that kind of familiarity doesn't stop you from talking with them comfortably, hugging them tightly, and lounging around in your panties in the living room.
And that familiarity no doubt beats change.
And so I am confident that my relationship with the ones I love will not fade with trends, revolutionary ideas, new friends and new jobs.
We may all take different paths and find ourselves in different parts of the map, but if you take a look at the map, you'll all see little giggly figures waving hands at one other, saying hello, and still gossiping like there's no tomorrow.

So don't dig yet, I'm not going down anytime soon.