NOT a martyr

I don't want to be responsible for someone's future, because I can only do so much.
I have tried my best to help them but they don't want to be helped.
They say they need me and they want me to be part of their lives, to help them solve their problems. But I can only do so much.
If they only knew how many sleepless nights I have been going through, thinking of how to deal with this. I am only one person, and even if I want to save lives and make everything all right, I have my own problems and I have a goal too, and I don't want to mess things up.
I do not want to lose my focus, go down with the circumstances, be a martyr and ruin my life. I am not selfish, but I just don't think I am accountable for a big mess that I didn't start in the first place. I want to move on and forget I was ever part of it.
I am not a coward. I just love myself. And as much as I love them, they must understand that even if I weren't there, the mess would still exist and they would just have to deal with it on their own. I am in deep shit, so deep I don't even know when I will come out of it. But I will, and I am sure that I will live through this, stronger and wiser.
I have so much self-love.
I need a hug!