i am angry

My horoscope today says it’s ok to be angry. Controlled anger is normal, and as long as I can express it without ruining other people’s lives then I have every right to turn red.

I am so frustrated. Work has been ruthless and though I know that it’s not like all eyes are on me waiting for me to commit a grave mistake, I can’t help but feel overwhelmed and pressured. I’ll lose all my hair before 6 PM, I swear.

I am also sad that the weekend has gone by and I am back in my swivel chair that sometimes disappears after lunch and reappears when it wants to. I am back to answering a thousand emails and deciding on things to which a simple “yes” or “no” could make all the difference. I can make ruin the program in a split second, or can make it one of the best episodes. Aside from that I am in charge of everything else until the end of the week, which is seemingly ages from now!

I am also harboring bad feelings towards my friend because she’s been very inconsistent and I really don’t want to have to do anything with her or for her because she has a bad habit of taking me for granted. I tried helping her out and working out her request but she’s just been so scatter-brained and I don’t want to get involved in her shit, as I already have my own to deal with. Her annoying habits are taking their toll on me and our friendship and no matter how much I love her she’s just throwing it all away.

I am angry. And I like being angry because I have reasons to feel this way. I want to scream and shout but won’t. I want to pull your hair but I won’t. I want to tell my friend that she can forget about our friendship but I won’t.

Will take a hot bath instead. Or go out for sushi with a friend.