For Aimee: Reasons to Eat Healthy

Aimee is the one on the right side, wearing the tube top with a hole on each side to create an illusion of a smaller waist. It worked then, but now I don't think holes on a tube top can do the trick.

Aimee has become so happy with her single life and successful career that she has forgotten to take care of her body, munching on lard and having as much rice as she can take in.



I think it's disgusting and this has got to stop, especially after feeling the effects of staying in shape and eating healthy. So I have made it a point to help her.

Here are some of the reasons to eat healthy. I made this list to motivate Aims and push her to get out there and let her fats evaporate into thin air. If these don't help, that means she is a pathetic porker and will never ever have the chance to perform a sexy dance in front of thousands of people.

1. Pooping won't be a chore anymore, but a very intense and gratifying human experience.

2. You will look like a female human being again.

3. You'll fit through your the doors of your office.

4. You won't have to make fun of yourself all the time and cry in your room later.

5. You won't have to worry about diabetes, hypertension, smelly sweat, a dark neck and gout.

6. You will have the right to bash your former flame, who according to you now looks like King Coopa from Mario Brothers.

7. You will finally fit into your tiny clothes. Remember, you used to wear next-to-nothing outfits in college?

8. Beach outing won't be scary anymore.

9. You will feel fresh and light in the morning. No snoring in the middle of the night, no more dreams of becoming the Marshmallow Lady, and most importantly, no more loud farts.

10. You will get laid again! Yay! So throw your dildo away and get thin.