For Aimee: Reasons to Eat Healthy

Aimee is the one on the right side, wearing the tube top with a hole on each side to create an illusion of a smaller waist. It worked then, but now I don't think holes on a tube top can do the trick.

Aimee has become so happy with her single life and successful career that she has forgotten to take care of her body, munching on lard and having as much rice as she can take in.



I think it's disgusting and this has got to stop, especially after feeling the effects of staying in shape and eating healthy. So I have made it a point to help her.

Here are some of the reasons to eat healthy. I made this list to motivate Aims and push her to get out there and let her fats evaporate into thin air. If these don't help, that means she is a pathetic porker and will never ever have the chance to perform a sexy dance in front of thousands of people.

1. Pooping won't be a chore anymore, but a very intense and gratifying human experience.

2. You will look like a female human being again.

3. You'll fit through your the doors of your office.

4. You won't have to make fun of yourself all the time and cry in your room later.

5. You won't have to worry about diabetes, hypertension, smelly sweat, a dark neck and gout.

6. You will have the right to bash your former flame, who according to you now looks like King Coopa from Mario Brothers.

7. You will finally fit into your tiny clothes. Remember, you used to wear next-to-nothing outfits in college?

8. Beach outing won't be scary anymore.

9. You will feel fresh and light in the morning. No snoring in the middle of the night, no more dreams of becoming the Marshmallow Lady, and most importantly, no more loud farts.

10. You will get laid again! Yay! So throw your dildo away and get thin.

Is There An Easy Way To Do Anything?

Last year I received this book as a present, and I didn't really bother to read it.

Until recently.

Someone swore by the book, saying he quit smoking right after he put the book down.

He said it uses the principles of hypnosis and is guaranteed to make even the worst chain smoker refuse to light up again.

The author, Carr, was a long-time chain smoker, consuming as many as 100 cigarettes a day.

The book is pretty easy on the reader.

It says I can even smoke away while flipping its pages.

The important thing is to read it from cover to cover.

And then it's up to me.

The reason my copy had been lying around the flat collecting dust for over a year is simple.

I didn't want to quit.

I was enjoying it.

I loved it.

But as my lungs and other body parts showed symptoms of defiance and disagreement with my mentality, I realized that maybe it was time to get rid of the magic stick.

The moment I opened the book, I got really scared.

What if I was fated to end up as one of the few who didn't give up after reading the book?

Would that mean I'm a hopeless loser?

What if my nicotine addiction is greater than my will power?

What if in the end, I choose to accept the fact that the world is twisted, that authorities choose to sleep with tobacco corporations and the consumers are willing victims of this whole shit?

What if the book doesn't work on me?

But all my what ifs will be assuaged onlly if I try it out.

And that's exactly what I am doing right now.

Maybe I was sick in the head all this time, and it's time to repair my brain.

And maybe the book will help.

If not with my smoking, maybe with other areas of my life.

That's how you learn about yourself right?

Try it out.

And all the what ifs and maybes will go away, no matter how things turn out.

Try it out.

Ok time for a fag.

Today I interviewed a bunch of UAE nationals about their career prospects.
They are all so lucky.
Jobs await them even before they step out of college.
Companies are eager to employ them to up their Emiratization numbers.
We used to have that kind of thing earlier this century.
What a big joke.
Now we're spread all over the world and don't have plans of going back home to work.

Speaking of work, I am so bored.
There's no breaking news, just my skin breaking out.
There's no big event, just my big fat ass stuck to the chair.
There's no extraordinary person to interview, just my extraordinary dislike for idleness in the office.
I am so bored.

Speaking of work, I am going to work out later.
It's high time I flush the McDonalds gunk out of my system.

Ali G FBI interview

I had McDonalds and I feel sick.
Sonia gave me this herbal laxative.
Will use it tonight.
Also will disinfect the toilet.
And try to sleep without wrinkling my face.
Hi Aims!

Gigs' Night Out Minus Nikko, Me and Fifi

I miss my gigs and San Mig Light.

Happy birthday Charm and Kath!

Aimee's Future Husband

This is going to be Aimee's future husband.

And I don't think I will be at her wedding.

Love you Aims!

The Rebound

I watched this movie last evening.

Chick flick, no doubt.

But very realistic.

Love the guy though.

There are guys like that in this world?

And if I'm gonna have kids, they better be like the kids in the movie.

I would raise them uptown but will make sure they can talk like black people.

That would be hilarious.

I don't know why I wore a really big bra today.
I don't even know why I own a really big bra.
It feels really heavy.
Did I wake up with so much confidence that I thought my breasts were a cup bigger?
Or was I just too sleepy to care which underwear to wear?
That remains a mystery.
Hate big bras with wood-hard underwires and straps that kill my shoulders.
But need to endure this feeling until 6 PM.
Oh the problems we have in life.

CLOSER - DIDO

Are you kidding me?
There's a karaoke version of this song?
I love this song!
Reminds me of my first date in Dubai.
2006. Summer.
Roses, Breezers.
Fifi and her dance moves.
Single Colin, troubled Craig.
Fat Zeena.
What? It's been almost four years?

Barrio Fiesta Opens in Dubai

Barrio Fiesta, one of the Philippines' most popular Filipino restaurants, is opening in Dubai on Tuesday evening! Yesterday they served the Filipino press a sumptuous three-course meal that has ruined my diet but lifted my spirits. I felt at home with all that bagoong!

This is me and Ate Aysha. I just finished dinner when she and Khadijah arrived, so I kind of forced a smile despite the bloated feeling.

Ok. The food was amazing. The plates and the whole presentation will be changed on the opening night. Last night was just a trial thing. So in this picture, there's laing, tahong, sugpo, kare kare and sago gulaman. I had a little bit of some of them and too much of the Bacolod garlic rice, as well as the bagoong rice.

The press were invited and they all looked pleased with the food. I'm sure that on Tuesday, with the dazzling performance of a Filipino singing group, the traditional costumes of the servers, and the fiesta-inspired decorations in the restaurant, my peeps will love it!

I hope foreigners will try it out. It's a welcome change from the usual Pinoy restaurants every one is used to seeing on the streets of Karama and Deira.

New Cousin!

I have a new cousin! Tito Alex and his lovely wife just had their second baby boy, Roan. Alika now has a brother, and I now have millions of little cousins with contagious smiles all over the world. I have not even seen some of them, but I keep myself updated and look at their pictures all the time.
I heard Alika is a very friendly boy, and likes to smile a lot. Good. Tito Alex is very lucky to have two cute boys in his family.
I bet my aunts and uncles will never believe how much I've grown. Some of them haven't seen me in more than a decade. When I was as young as Alika, I didn't have cousins. I was the eldest. Now there's one born every year! One big happy family.
Even though I am in my late 20's, I still want to be able to play with my little cousins. When I see them, I am going to give them presents and make them laugh and just get them warmed up to the idea of having a really old cousin they've never seen before. Just the thought of them makes me feel young again. And playful and carefree. I've got to hang out with all of them before I get hitched. I don't want them to have nieces and nephews without even meeting me!

Aimee

My college friend Aimee has resurfaced.
I remember that she was very sad at one point in her life and complained about everything.
Now she is in a much better place and is able to utilize her talent and intelligence with a job she enjoys.
We got in touch again last week, and our conversations have never been more meaningful.
It was as if we were just having coffee as Seattles Katipunan on a late week night.
She offers me excellent advice and tells it like it is.
Plus she's offering bartending courses for nothing, and I think I will take one in December.
It's high time I reconnect with friends back home.
It is proving to be very beneficial.

Aimee thinks she's fat.
Maybe she is.
Porker.

Beck - Loser

2009

Chiara's email couldn't be more true.
2009 is a crazy year for all of us.

She's broken up with Randy after almost a decade.
Terri is getting married.
Cookie's house was almost destroyed by the flood.
Kath welcomed Carlo into her life and also suffered from the flood.
Wyson became a doctor.
Nikko became a lawyer.
Charm has quit her job to prepare for her migration to Canada.
Fifi started dating a guy other than her first boyfriend, but returned to the bastard anyway.
And me? One awesome holiday and one failed relationship.

It's amazing how each of us has a major story to tell this year.
It's usually this and that, blah blah, shits and giggles.
Maybe our lives have become too boring and needed to be shaken up.
This year definitely required more energy and thinking and support from the people we trust and love than I imagined.

My mom said that the Chinese believe that 2009 was going to be bad, because 9 is a very unlucky number.
I personally don't believe that.
It wasn't as if I lost my job (knock on wood) or a loved one (knock again).
I am healthy. I have my whole body intact and my whole life ahead of me.
And there is no lucky or unlucky.
There is only happiness, and it is our only choice.
Happiness or death.

At Terri's wedding, our speeches will be more meaningful.
The toast we will propose will be heartfelt.
And the laughter will be genuine.
2009 is crazy, but so are we.

Breast TLC: While You're In The Shower

Breast TLC: While You're In The Shower

Let's not be scared of breast cancer.
We can kick its ass.
But let's win the war before going to battle.
To all my girlfriends, take care of yourselves and be good to your bodies.
I'm one to talk.

Victory. Period.

(image courtesy of NY Times)

The New York Times reports that it is the first time in more than two decades that an American has won the New York City Marathon.

And that American goes by the name Meb Keflezighi.

Born in Eritrea, he moved to the US when he was 12, where he underwent a series of distance running programs.

In short, he is a product of American training, not discounting the fact that he has earned himself an American passport.

But academics opened room for debate on whether his victory is deserving of American celebration.

They argue that race is essential in Athletics.

Meb's African origin plays a big role in his triumph.

Many marathons are won by Africans.

I do not know how they are trained in their continent, but the number of winners from their region cannot be ignored.

It must have something to do with their racial make up.

But Meb is American and has been living the American dream since he moved to the US.

I think that if a person has made a decision to change his life and make a name for himself, with enough perseverance and faith, there is nothing that can prevent him from moving forward.

I assume that like all other immigrants, Meb's family left their country to give their son a better future, and here it is, in the form of a very prestigious accomsplishment.

I have many relatives who migrated to wealthier countries because of their desire to live a better life.

To stop worrying about healthcare, mortgage, education and other expenses that seem like luxuries in the Philippines.

And their decision must be respected by the rest of the world.

It is not an easy one.

In fact, it is painful.

They set off for good, fingers crossed that they will be given equal opportunities as a reward for the hard work they are willing to do.

As long as they are not harming anyone else and have good intentions, they have the right to succeed wherever they choose to settle.

I believe in the notion of a borderless society.

In fact, I believe it is not a mere concept anymore.

It is evident across the globe.

And those who are in denial will be left behind sooner or later.

My Favorite Things

Everyone has their own list of favorite things.
Things that make us tingle inside and glow on the outside.
They are tangible, and therefore cannot be dismissed as unreal or disproved.
They give us an irreversible sense of comfort that is hard to dispel when we're in the moment of appreciating them.
They are the things that we either bought, received from someone special, or found.
Some meaningful, some simply too cute to ignore.
Nevertheless, they are the ones that cheer us up and make us feel good.
What are your favorite things?
Here are mine:

1. My journal. I will never divulge my secrets on the internet for everyone to feast on, but when it comes to writing in my journal, I disclose every single detail of my life. And that is why I love it. It doesn't argue with me; it just listens. Swallows every painful or happy thought streaming from my mind down to the pencil, onto the paper. I've kept a journal since I was eleven. Sixteen years on, I am still as enthusiastic to jot down my life bit by bit as I was when I was in fifth grade.

2. My Our Daily Bread book. My mom gave it to me last year before I left for Dubai. Every day I read it to gain wisdom and inspiration so that I may live each life to the fullest. Equipped with the little blue book, I challenge life to challenge me. It's always helped me in making big decisions. And when I cannot make a decision, The One Up There makes ways to decide for me.

3. My iPod Mini. It's 750 songs that date back to 2004. 750 songs reminding me of different times in my life, especially when I was writing scripts for a TV show back home. It's got everything: Spice Girls, Placebo, Live, Fuel, Garbage, No Doubt, Ciudad, E-heads, Cynthia Alexander. It's got everything I need to get my through a long drive down Emirates Road.

4. My fan. I love fanning my face! It reminds me of Maria Clara and Sunday masses. I feel like a lady and I feel heavily guarded -- ironically, with such a feminine weapon. I would like to be as soft spoken and flawless as the traditional Filipina, but I can only fan my face.

5. A mixed CD. When I was in college one of my good friends said he was in love with me, and gave me a CD of songs that he liked, and maybe helped him tell how he felt towards me. A relationship between us never materialized, but I kept the CD and I've always listened to it. Beth Orton's Central Reservation (acoustic version) is one of the best tracks for me.

6. My phone. I need not say more, but I will. With it I can get in touch with the people I love, wherever they are in the world. Plus it makes me look busy when I am alone. If it weren't for it, I would probably be bored and homesick and drop dead eventually.

7. My milk salt spa. Scrubbing is very very therapeutic, especially when the grains smell great! My friends recommended a certain brand of scrub and I've been using it twice a week. I believe it improves blood circulation and makes my skin smoother, plus it makes me feel really good inside and out, knowing that I am taking care of myself and people are noticing.

Halloween 2009

The Hosts, Butch and Patrick
On the balcony with Snow White in the center

Miss Congeniality. Yup. That's what I went as.

Where's my donut?

It would have worked if I had longer legs like Sandra Bullock.

Happy and gay!

Mae the Vietnamese rice planter, Momzi the geisha, and Sherry, a cross between Chun Li and a leading Mano Po character.

Awesome Halloween party.
I went as Miss Congeniality.
Nice pink gown (which Fifi and Mae stitched up in three seconds).
A bejewelled tiara.
Boots.
A gun strapped to my thigh.
And of course. A donut.
I had to eat two donuts to complete my ensemble.
So I mingled with Chun Li, a geisha, Audrey Hepburn, Annie and a bunch of other fun people.
Not much drinking and smoking, which is good.
A but of dancing.
I loved the party.
It was a much needed break and a chance to go gay again.