Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Another One About My Sister



Ok Zoe is turning 15 in a couple of months.
She just blossomed into a pretty young thing.
She was cute and chubby ten years ago.
Total transformation.
When I turned fifteen, I had teeth.
When I was five I didn't.
That was it.
But my sister is just killing it.
I can totally get over the fat date.
Her growth is just unbelievable.

Human Giant: Commercial Jingles (Part 1)

Human Giant: Commercial Jingles Part 2

Philippine Tourism AVP

Monday, March 22, 2010

Human Giant: Let's Go

This is dope.

Roy baffled me with a question on Facebook chat.
"Zeena, pano ba maging ninja?"
Oookay.
And I can't believe the answer is on the internet!
http://www.wikihow.com/Be-a-Ninja
And Wikihow suggests that playing Parkour will actually lead to ninja-hood.
That is unbelievable.
So there is actually a possibility that Roy will eventually become a ninja.
Wow. Talk about waste of ambition.
No offense to ninjas, but seriously, do these guys have health insurance?
I sent the link to him anyway.
It's his call.
If he does become one in the near future, I'm going to consult Wikihow on how to become god.

Sunday, March 21, 2010

Sundays

I don't hate Sundays.
How could I.
It used to be the day for church in the morning and reserving the rest of the afternoon watching ASAP and The Buzz.
Sometimes Greenhills was on the agenda.
And now it's the first day of the week.
It's the day I psyche myself to get ready for five days of everything and nothing.
Okay.
Sundays are great in general.
Another weekend has come and gone and another week ahead is bound to challenge my intellect, patience and ability to work under the premise that I would rather not.
Sometimes I think a particular Sunday starts out wrong and the rest of the week will follow through, but then on Tuesday or Wednesday something incredibly awesome happens.
And just like that, Sunday is forgotten.
So yeah I don't hate Sundays.
Sometimes I have a feeling that it hates me.
But I keep my middle finger down and relax my fist.

Saturday, March 20, 2010

ENCARNACION - NACHO LIBRE


Fifi and I sang this for two straight days.
It never ever gets old.
No no no no no no way Jose.

Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Raaaaaaaandy and I have the same shizzo going on. Before Funny People was even conceived, I already used the multiple vowel method to excite my fanbase. I created my Yahoo email address, zeenahhh@yahoo.com I used three H's because "zeena" wasn't available. Anyway the H was supposed to be pronounced in a perky way, as if you just took a sip of the best soda in the world. Not as if you were trying to seduce someone but to no avail. Zeena is not a sexy name.

So anyway I'm psyched to have realized that Raaaaaaaandy and I have some things in common when it comes to humor and keeping the crowd going gaga. One noticeable difference between us is, there is actually a crowd cheering him on in his neck of the woods.

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

I want a black doll now. It's the craziest thing ever. I love it.




I want a black rapping, beat-boxing, ass kicking doll.
I saw one at Festival City and I am begging Fifi to buy it for me.
It's a mass-produced rapping brotha with "Hip Hop" proudly written on his shirt.
And guess what. When you press his hand he busts out a mean rap song.
I want that toy! I want that toy!

Also if there is a Raaaaaaaandy doll I would love one as well.
Randy with 8 A's.
Loooooooooooooool.
In yo' face!

Al Jazeera English - Asia-Pacific - Thai demonstrators 'draw blood'

Al Jazeera English - Asia-Pacific - Thai demonstrators 'draw blood'

Okay. Very symbolic.
Disgusting too.
If one of them had a deadly disease that could be spread all over Bangkok through this bizarre form of protest, that would be a bigger story.
These guys are waaay too advance for me.
Political unrest is a common thing in most parts of the world.
But trust the Southeast Asians to color it bad. And red.
Here's a high five to the Thais for setting us back a hundred more years!

Flight of the Conchords: Bret and Jemaine meet Jim

Annoying new friends.
Classic.
Cracked me up big time.

Monday, March 15, 2010

HBO Boxing: Pacquiao vs. Clottey - Face-Off w/ Max Kellerman (HBO)

Media savvy much?
I wish he never had a mistress, because I used to respect him 100%, grammar and all.

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Investopedia says....

I am officially a ghetto sista. How cool is that!
Actually Investopedia's term for it is....

Slumburbs.
What Does Slumburbs Mean?A slang term for the suburbs of once large and prosperous cities that have become less desirable due to an economic downturn. Slumburbs refer to the neighborhoods and small towns that cannot consistently attract highly educated and entrepreneurial people. As a result, business in these previously hopeful communities diminishes leading to such negative outcomes as unemployment and crime. Slumburbs can also refer to areas in otherwise wealthy cities that experience similar problems.
Investopedia explains
Slumburbs In contrast to the poor neighborhoods found in California and New York, which are often referred to as "ghettos", slumburbs have regular real estate developments and required amenities such as parks and schools. At one point, these areas were prosperous and saw increased real estate deveolpment, but became too expensive for the potential or current owners. Due to a high level of foreclosure in such areas, families move away, leaving vacant homes that fall into disrepair. These types of communities usually arise during tough economic times.

International City was once a nice place, you know. Now it only looks nice after a nice downpour, when rain water instantly washes away the dust on buildings and streets, revealing the original bright peach hue of my building, not to mention its royal blue roof.
Our parking lot, once filled with fourwheel drive vehicles owned my residents who went out on weekends and led typical yuppie lives were replaced by commercial vehicles used to transport fruits and vegetables, move furniture, and you get the picture.
A number of crimes, mostly murders, have also taken place here.
People have no time to get rid of their garbage properly, exchange pleasantries, and some times, shower.
But they do have time to spit on the floor, get into fights, and kill me with dirty looks in the lift.
Only thing missing is a gang of crack-dealing thugs and maybe your friendly neighborhood rap group to keep the place upbeat in the face of adversity. And if they do rise to stardom, we be like "They our brothas!"
Holla!!!!!!!!!!

Tuesday, March 09, 2010

An Awwww-some Farewell









From 2006 throughout 2009, I witnessed people leaving the company and moving on.
They would get a pat on the back, a handshake, a smile and best wishes.
Some people chip in to buy something nice, like a cake and maybe a small gift.
I had always thought I would make a quiet exit eventually, without anyone noticing or missing me or thinking why my desk has been deserted.
I was wrong. These people actually like me!
They bought me ice cream because they knew I was not fond of cake.
And they got it from Coldstone, and it reminded me of the craaazy bit in Aziz Ansari's monologue about that damn creamery.
They gave me two books (aaawesome) and threw in some chick-chick-chicken, courtesy of the hippest GMO chain in the world, KFC.
Okay here's the best part...
Khadijah made a video of everyone in the office bidding farewell to me.
It was very, very touching.
Ganda, Sonia, Evelyn, Natasha, Usman.
Roy just tear-blocking everyone in the team.
Suraj calling me Gina.
Aziz singing Bad Romance by Lady Gaga. (Proud to say I taught him that! Not bad. Now he speaks Pashtu, knows how to say different body parts in English and Tagalog, and sings the latest hits on Virgin Radio.)
And then, as if that wasn't enough to fill my heart with gladness and replace the smoke in my lungs with gratitude, they gave me a shirt.
Its design was a collection of pictures of me sleeping on the job.
It was all Sonia's idea. She took a picture of me every time I fell asleep at my desk.
Every single time.
Did I drool and snore? I don't know okay, but I can pretty much manage some serious REM in 5 minutes, seated, with my hand on my chin and my eyes leveled with the headline of some news website.
Anyway the shirt said, "Why Think When You Can Meditate?"
Finally, someone who understands me!
It was overwhelming and I just realized that that it was a far cry from the goodbye I imagined before. I was thinking: pack bags, empty drawers, scram.
They gave me: Awwwwwwww.
Because, as the expression implies, I'm awwwesome.

Thursday, March 04, 2010

This is my last day at work and I'm trying to keep things quiet.
Mainly because I'm sad and I will miss these guys.
We had KFC for lunch and (here's the scoop) ... I am guessing they are going to surprise me with ice cream later! Yeah! That's what I'm talking about!
I love ice cream. It just makes me really happy.
Ok how did I know? I saw a scooper on the office table.
Uh duh. If that's not for ice cream it must be for measuring the loose change we have right before we get our salaries every single month.
So yeah it's definitely ice cream!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
My colleagues love me as much as a I love them! Yay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
How often does one resign and get ice cream?
Suck on that.