This is exactly the kind of thing that makes me a little kinder, and things a little more visible to me.
Last evening I was enjoying a glass of Baileys and milk when the doorbell rang. I eagerly opened the door to find a Chinese lady with bags full of copy copy DVDs.
My knee-jerk reaction has always been to say "no money, she she..." and shut the door.
And then I realized, the Chinese lady was human too. And I needed someone --- anyone --- to keep my mind off the very distracting and destructive thought of the boy next door.
So I let her in and bought what seemed like a 1000-in-1 DVD for only 20 AED. Not bad. Not bad at all.
So she thanked me and kept on smiling like she was trying to tell me something. While I didn't want to answer her with my meaningless forced smiling, I got creative. I opened the BBC website and showed her the pictures of the recent earthquake in China. Her face fell. Ok I just ruined her day.
Anyway we ended our chat happily, by exchanging She She's. And she promised to be back. When she's back I hope I won't ignore her anymore.
Even if I had my life back.
So there. I can't believe certain feelings soften your boundaries and allow you to be more open to others.
This is the kind of feeling that makes you finally buy a DVD from the Chinese lady you usually shooed away on a normal day.
This is the kind of feeling that makes you buy hair spray.
This is the kind of feeling that discourages you to eat like a trucker.
This is the kind of feeling that makes you watch the movies and read the books you've put off for so long.
This is the kind of feeling that just makes you stand in front of the mirror and dance to Glamorous by Fergie.
And make sure that your hair is the right kind of messy.
And sleep on Desperate Housewives dreaming of killing Terri Hatcher.
Wednesday, May 14, 2008
Monday, May 12, 2008
Sunday, May 11, 2008
I can't believe I spilled red wine all over his new sofa. It's peach, and it's four days old. And yes, I could tell he was livid inside. How could he show anger to a lady who has obviously reapplied lip gloss a dozen times and combed her hair so that the fringes rested excatly on her cheeks, giving him the opportunity to brush them with his fingers? He kept that Joker-like smile on his face, and I was still happy he had the decency not to throw me out of his place, even though I conveniently live next door.
Nevertheless, I think, his kind forgiveness was a complete act. Not a good one even. I spilled wine on myself first before I accidentally splashed it on the sofa. My cute top, my skirt. All over me. If I walked out in the hall way my other neighbors would think I was fermenting. And yet he never even bothered to ask if I was okay. He asked if I wanted to wash my skirt (which would mean I would have to step out of his bathroom skirtless), and I refused. He could have just shown some concern. The way he looked at his poor peach sofa, and the way he scrubbed it silly with a stain remover, you'd think I wasn't there. But I had to be there because I spilled the wine.
He's a furniture freak. But why would a man redecorate his house fifty seven times solely for his pleasure? I have not heard of furniture fetish, but I DO know that gay people are the best in furniture design. It's their passion.
Speaking of passion, I am not very passionate about this thing. He's my next door neighbor and if we got too involved, I would mess things up. Big time. And even in my building I wouldn't be able to move around with liberty. This morning I had to take the stairs because his friends crashed his place last night and we found ourselves heading for the lift at 8 AM. I didn't want to exchange awkward looks with them in the lift, so I ran down three floors (panting and all) just to catch my bus.
That was absolutely appalling. I hope I don't have too many cute neighbors. Ok one more wouldn't hurt.
Nevertheless, I think, his kind forgiveness was a complete act. Not a good one even. I spilled wine on myself first before I accidentally splashed it on the sofa. My cute top, my skirt. All over me. If I walked out in the hall way my other neighbors would think I was fermenting. And yet he never even bothered to ask if I was okay. He asked if I wanted to wash my skirt (which would mean I would have to step out of his bathroom skirtless), and I refused. He could have just shown some concern. The way he looked at his poor peach sofa, and the way he scrubbed it silly with a stain remover, you'd think I wasn't there. But I had to be there because I spilled the wine.
He's a furniture freak. But why would a man redecorate his house fifty seven times solely for his pleasure? I have not heard of furniture fetish, but I DO know that gay people are the best in furniture design. It's their passion.
Speaking of passion, I am not very passionate about this thing. He's my next door neighbor and if we got too involved, I would mess things up. Big time. And even in my building I wouldn't be able to move around with liberty. This morning I had to take the stairs because his friends crashed his place last night and we found ourselves heading for the lift at 8 AM. I didn't want to exchange awkward looks with them in the lift, so I ran down three floors (panting and all) just to catch my bus.
That was absolutely appalling. I hope I don't have too many cute neighbors. Ok one more wouldn't hurt.
Friday, May 02, 2008
Dating has always been an exciting part of my life. Most of the time though, I am not in the dating loop.
In a year, maybe five guys would ask for my number, two of them would actually call, and well, those two are most likely to just mess it up before the third date.
There are times when I get a little impatient, but most of the time I just sit back and relax. Oh and drink.
Last week the guy next door (literally the guy in the flat next to ours) asked for my number. We said hi while waiting for the lift and then in the lift, we exchanged How are yous. And then on the ground floor, he out down his coffee mug and whipped out his... mobile phone and asked for my number. Great. Last evening he said we should get together some time. So the big question is, will we be able to do that? And the bigger question is, are we going to get along? If not then I would have to take a longer route going to my flat just to avoid his door.
My point is, ok this stage is very exciting, and I can't wait to see how this turns out. If he turned out to be an idiot, I would be so disappointed.
In a year, maybe five guys would ask for my number, two of them would actually call, and well, those two are most likely to just mess it up before the third date.
There are times when I get a little impatient, but most of the time I just sit back and relax. Oh and drink.
Last week the guy next door (literally the guy in the flat next to ours) asked for my number. We said hi while waiting for the lift and then in the lift, we exchanged How are yous. And then on the ground floor, he out down his coffee mug and whipped out his... mobile phone and asked for my number. Great. Last evening he said we should get together some time. So the big question is, will we be able to do that? And the bigger question is, are we going to get along? If not then I would have to take a longer route going to my flat just to avoid his door.
My point is, ok this stage is very exciting, and I can't wait to see how this turns out. If he turned out to be an idiot, I would be so disappointed.
I never for the life of me imagined myself in this position, at this point of my life. The stakes are higher now, but I have never been more comfortable with what I am doing. My family is also facing some tough challenges.
However seemingly overwhelming, I think that all these simultaneous changes are not an accident. After all, the whole universe knows that Mama and Zoe are two of the strongest females I have ever known, the one and only reason they are facing a lot of intertwined transitions that are bound to turn our life around as a family.
However seemingly overwhelming, I think that all these simultaneous changes are not an accident. After all, the whole universe knows that Mama and Zoe are two of the strongest females I have ever known, the one and only reason they are facing a lot of intertwined transitions that are bound to turn our life around as a family.
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