The Fat Game

Lis and I took a walk by the creek to get some fresh air and fuel our fear of getting fat. We played a little game that required us to call each other "fat" names. So she called me Dabiana and I called her Lard Ass. She called me Miss Piggy and I called her Big Momma. You get the picture.
It was so much fun. We got a high out of the whole fat name calling thing that we didn't want to stop. We're both online right now and she just called me Rolly Polly Porker Belly. Wow. Original. I tried my best to come up with something. Miss Pork Rind 2009. It's an endorphin-boosting exercise.


Try it.
You're so fat trying you can't procreate.
You're so fat you ate your fiancee.
You're so fat you don't need tampons, your thighs do all the absorbing.
You're so fat your fingers stick together when you type.
You're so fat you're tempted to cook yourself.
You're so fat you can fly like a giant balloon.
You're so fat you look like a sofa when seated.
When standing, you look like a fridge.
You're so fat you are the capital of your country.
You're so fat you need a whole year to poop.
You're so fat you can never be phat.
You're so fat like that yo!